Having not stepped out of my house besides to get jabbed for about two months now, I have been in a downward spiral in the game of mental health. It got me thinking as I particularly did not have a “happening” life prior to the lockdown as well. I was an average person with an average lifestyle which would be referred to as mundane. So how is the current mundane different from the mundane I had?
As far as science goes, humans are social creatures. Without much indulgence in any community, the sense of belonging has begun to vaporise and without a sense of belonging, loneliness has crept in. How can I be less lonely then? Well, I am yet to decode that but perhaps the answer lies in the little things I miss from my pre-covid life.
I miss sipping chai + grabbing a bite of sandwich to satiate thirst and hunger, strolling down the street late at night to soak in the coldness of the weather.
I miss the late-night terrace talks with friends star-gazing, and the drive to hot chocolate on empty roads.
I miss the dress-ups I played, and not being able to flick jackets from friends.
I miss playing tic tac toe on the track and playing Hide ‘n seek with the police every morning while riding the scooter without a helmet.
I miss having cheese crackers for breakfast, unwinding at my breakfast spot after a long day, and the smell of restaurants.
I miss zoning out during in-person meetings and using the “stuck in traffic” as an excuse for skipping meetings.
I miss walking in the park and basking in the evening sun.
I miss sifting through books in a library, and I miss finding little notes in my books
I miss the boundary between the light and the dark, and now, I miss the boundary between the days themselves.
But, what I definitely don’t miss is the Bengaluru sambhar I had with dosa every morning near my office.
What is the meaning then?
What we called mundane was indeed the key to feeling alive in my case. I don’t believe there is any meaning to life. But as we are here, we might as well live the way want to. Perhaps, I shall try to recreate some of the little things I miss to “live”.
